disintegrate

update update!!
guess this two days alot of things happening, and it really made me think alot.
wad different ppl like jia, jeff told me.
in the start, i'll be abit disagree on wad they said.
but to think abt it, maybe wad they said are quite true.
makes me really think wad life's all abt..

shiwei juz asked me a question, "WHY?"
perhaps most of the time there's no answer to a question.
humans are complicated creatures.
its really difficult to try to understand another person.
after all, we r living in this broken down world.
no one is perfectt!
everyone is different. there's no two person that are exactly the same.
even twins are not the same in terms of personality, etc.

wad does friendship even mean?
for some, maybe its juz a simple HELLO?
but for me its really different.
i hope to have a divine relationship with my friends.
i wanna noe how my fren is living their life.
in reality, most ppl dun think this way.
tis can be sad sometimes.

there are many kinds of relationship with ppl i guess?
introduction, acquintances, frenship, intimate rs.
at least, i pray that with my frens, we r either acquintances, or even frenship.
i dun wish to have a rs that is like introduction.
whereby when we c each another all the time, the only thing we can actually say is HELLO?
isnt it sad? to me, i wont rather not have them as my frens.
after all, wad do i actually noe abt them? nth?
wad can we noe abt others thru hello?

im looking for frenz,
ppl that i can trust upon,
ppl that i can pour my pain to,
ppl that can guide me in my walk with God,
ppl who will help me grow spiritually.
im truly blessed.
cos i do haf at least one fren that is like that.

ultimately, my best friend can only be Jesus.
He will nv fail me.
and He is always there, in my darkest moments.
i shall bow down to You, i shall go down on my knees.
giving You all the praise and all the glory. worshipping You all my days.
wad more could i ask for?
all i desire is You!!